29; A Gift (and A Lesson) From God

God works in mysterious, subtle ways. And sometimes He smacks you over the head with a two-by-four. Today was a two-by-four day for me.

I'm 29 today. I cried myself to sleep last night because I never thought I'd be 29 and childless, the weekend wasn't the birthday celebration we had expected, and MM was sicker than he's been in years. I woke up this morning grouchy and not ready to face my 29th year.

MM usually does the grocery shopping, and was going to go tomorrow, but his illness necessitated a Sunday trip and I was the only candidate. I ended up just planning out the meals and grocery shopping for the month, so the day was starting out with a rushed breakfast and a long shopping trip. I was not happy.

I headed out, as usual, to water the garden, mumbling to myself because, being my birthday and all, MM would have done it for me if he was well. I wasn't out there two minutes when God showed me His birthday gift for me. This beauty was flitting around my garden, drinking in the water I'd just showered on the ground.



She was huge, probably the size of my hand, and certainly the biggest one I've seen outside of a zoo or botanical garden. I am still in awe of the bright, beautiful colors. I am even more in awe of the fact that she kept flying away, over our tall metal fence, and kept coming back, giving me plenty of time to run inside, get the camera, and snap these pictures.



They aren't the best shots and they don't convey what I was feeling when I was watching her flit about, but I know she was a gift from God to remind me that I have SO much in life to celebrate. I am so humbled by the fact that God sent me a reminder of His grace rather than a harsh discipline for my selfishness.

My day still didn't turn out the way I had envisioned it, and I'm still a selfish, imperfect human inside, but I am reminded that the God who created that stunning butterfly created me with even more care. He wants me to be happy and content with my life, but He wants me to be content with the simple things He's blessed me with, like His creation.

I am a work-in-progress; every day I am reminded how un-Christ-like I really am, but every day I am given a fresh slate to try again. I know God has amazing plans for my life, and at 29-years-old, I know I am right where He wants me to be. I glory in the fact that tomorrow is unknown to me, but known to Him.

Thank you, God, for the birthday gift you sent to this selfish human. I pray that you will help me, every day, to remember that no matter how bad I think I have it, I have salvation through your Son, and my eternal joy is secure in You. Help me also to remember that everything in my life happens in your perfect time and to count my blessings every day!

"'For I know the plans I have for you,' declares the Lord, 'plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.'" - Jeremiah 29:11, NIV